The Fake Sound of Progress

Hello once again,

A brief explanation to my RaUM-nivores: I've been fairly quiet recently but not because I haven't actually written anything. I've been recording a lot of my 'random and unforced musings' but there are certain things that are for my eyes only. Lately, when I've put the digital pen to paper, it's been more for the sake of self-therapy than public consumption. I thank you for understanding the importance of that personal writing process for me.

With that said, I think this would be a good time to fill you in on my weight loss/fitness progress.

I'm willing to go so far as to say that I am in the best shape of my adult life right now. In terms of weight, I've been staying steady at 195 pounds. I'm not too upset about that since I know that I'm leaner now than I've been in quite some time. Admittedly, I don't put a lot of stock in weight per se. I think that is where many people go wrong when trying to "lose weight". They focus on this one dimension, this single measurement to track their progress: the number on the scale.

This is not to downplay the importance of weight. It is surely the most visible and easily noticed change when someone adopts a new diet and/or an exercise plan. However, it's not the only tool at a person's disposal. For example, I know I'm leaner. My stomach is not as pronounced as it was when I first started my journey to better fitness/health. In addition to weighing myself, I also measure my mid-section to track how much girth I'm losing. The decrease in the size of the belly (along with hips, legs, and other body parts you may wish to measure) is an excellent motivator and an easy way to double check your progress when the scale doesn't make it overly apparent.

Many people overlook the role of new muscle built when beginning an exercise plan. I haven't completely abandoned the gym but I've tried to keep things simple by doing basic exercises at home. I haven't bulked up tremendously but I have noticed an improvement in my physique as a result of both the weight loss and the slight increase in muscle mass. With these two factors combined, there is a 'canceling out' effect on the scale. For all the fat I'm burning with my cardio, I'm replacing it with new muscle. I won't be naive enough to say it's a 1-to-1 ratio but I do recognize that the likely reason for not dropping more weight once I got under 200 lbs is due to new muscle.

Does this mean someone is not progressing if the scale keeps giving the same read out for weeks? Absolutely not. You have to consider other factors. Measuring your body is one tool. Another significant and, in my opinion, often overlooked factor is how you feel. Has your mood improved? Is there an increase in self-esteem? Are you feeling a sense of accomplishment? If not, it is likely that you're being too hard on yourself or that you have unrealistic expectations that need to be tempered. I've been there before. Now, I'm pleased knowing that sometimes I will make quick and immediately noticeable progress and have learned to accept that sometimes it'll take baby steps to get to where I want to be physically. I no longer get frustrated because I know that I'm taking all the right steps to ultimately arrive at my desired goal.

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Personal milestone: I recently did 30 consecutive pushups. I probably could have done another 5-10 but had in my mind to complete 30 and stopped there. This is a significant milestone for me because prior to this year I was never able to do more than 15 pushups. Even when I managed to do 15 pushups, the last 3-4 were always a struggle and the jelly arms would kick in as I wobbled up and down the movement.

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My cousin Nelson flew in from Portugal this weekend and unfortunately only stayed in NYC for two days. I haven't seen him in about 2 years and I love when he visits. When we see each other it's as if we has seen each other just a few days before. The beauty of this trip was that it was the first time his wife has been in NYC. I have not had the honor or privilege of meeting her until now. She is very chill, down to earth, and has a good sense of humor. If she hadn't already been married to my cousin I'd would have hit on her. haha. ;)

I had a great time with them (and everyone else) last night at the family gathering. I offered to take them to the airport this morning for their flight to the west coast and had a nice convo with them during the car ride. I hate to see them go so soon but it gave me additional motivation to get my act together and visit them in Portugal soon.

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With that, I bid you adieu for now!
Until next time, faithful reader......

Not Exactly New Year's Resolutions... More Like Life Goals.

Welcome to the year 2009, faithful reader:

I hope you all enjoyed yourselves this past New Year's Eve.

My goal this New Year's Eve was to do something different. Something that was outside of my comfort zone. I did accomplish that goal. Yet, I wasn't surrounded by friends and loved ones and I underestimated how lonely that would make me feel (despite having a decent time on NYE). It was strange to be surrounded by goombas and guidettes who are rolling in their tight little circles with a male-to-female ratio of nearly 3-to-1.

As the ball dropped in Times Square, the countdown was on. Despite watching it on the flat screen TV's scattered around the bar, the patrons still managed to mess up the countdown with loud, inebriated voices. I found myself seated next to a little old Italian man in a tan sweater and thought to myself "Is this what my life has become?" LOL. I'm kind of glad I didn't have a kiss at midnight considering the options immediately around me. (it was a sausage factory, after all)

Don't get me wrong. Free booze and free dinner on NYE is not a terrible consolation prize especially when considering a female friend was my benefactor last night. (Wait... now that I think about it... was I expected to put out? LOL) It certainly wasn't the way I thought I'd end up spending this NYE but I don't regret it.

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I suppose in the spirit of the season, I'm obligated by social norms to lay out a series of resolutions that I plan to work on throughout the year (or completely ignore and bitch about later in the year as I start a self-induced pity party). I personally think resolutions are BS. If we were serious about making a change in our lives, we shouldn't rely on January 1 to be the start date (though I certainly understand how symbolically useful it is). It's the old "Be the change you want to see in the world" philosophy. Rather than provide you with a list of resolutions, I'll leave a checklist of things (life goals, if you will) that I hope to accomplish in my lifetime. Let's see how many of these things I can scratch off the list in 2009:

- Teach a class (this is imminent but it stays on my list until the first day of class. I take nothing for granted.)
- Drive cross country (East-West)
- Drive cross country (North-South)
- Have kids (yes plural... I think kids need a sibling)
- Travel for the first time to (international): Egypt, Italy, Greece, Australia, Chile, Peru, Argentina, Brazil, southern France, Japan
- Travel for the first time to (domestic): Washington DC, Pheonix, Los Angeles, San Diego, Alaska
- Revisit: Portugal, Spain, Morocco, Colombia, Miami
- Go on a cruise
- Karaoke (for real: with the desire to actually sing a little and not due to peer pressure... lol)
- Write a short story
- Learn to play the guitar
- Learn to make paella
- Buy a house
- Fall in love again
- Have LASIK surgery (I love wearing glasses but sometimes it's a bit of a drag)
- Create a new alcoholic beverage to serve at parties
- Forgive my father rather than simply live with who he is and what he did
- Walk my daughter down the aisle at her wedding (clearly I would NEED a daughter first to be able to do this... lol)
- Learn to fluently curse in 3 languages, then 5 languages, then 8, then 10 (I think I'd stop at ten...lol)
- Get a tattoo (one that is meaningful and has personal value to me. Not just one that I picked out of an artist's portfolio)
- Learn to dance the tango
- Take a yoga class (I'd probably hate it but I'd like to try it at least once)

There's more... I know there is... I just can't remember any other things I'd like to add. I'll throw more things on here as they come to me. Consider this a starter list for my life goals. =)

I also have a short list of things I'd like to work on for the year. These aren't resolutions, per se. They're just a list of things I'd like to start correcting during the next phase of my life. Considering this is more personal and not something I'm willing to openly share, I'm leaving some words "blank". You can then play along by trying to guess the words (like a lame version of Mad Libs - without the parts of speech):
- Learn to separate ---------ship from --------ity
- Learn to ---st others
- Learn to eliminate lingering s--- d---t
- Learn to not question the m-----s of others
- Don't sweat the details. Simply, enjoy the ride and live life!

Until next time, faithful reader....